100 days.

I don't know whether to blame the wintry crap weather, or the pre-graduation "what does it all mean?" anxiety, but lately I've felt rather blah. It's so easy for me to get mired down in this negative bullshit, and I was feeling lonely, when I got an email from my mom. She told me a story about my five year old brother Joe, and how when he returned to school after winter break, his teacher asked the class to share their best experiences of winter break. Most kids gave answers like "my new Wii," etc., but when my brother was asked about his, he responded, "spending time with my older sister." I can't get over how sweet that is and how much this kid unconditionally loves me. It's crazy. I feel like I spend so much worthless time worrying about what I don't have, and what I will never have, and I ignore what is 'really important' or whatnot. I feel like I'm spewing a bunch of cliched sentiments, but it's true. It really lifted my spirits to hear that, and helped put me at ease with a lot of the dumb stuff I spend so much time worrying about. He also told me later, "I know you were home ten days last time, but I wish it was 100." He reminds me that there is a lot of love out there that I take for granted and under-appreciate, and that I should consciously work on being more grateful.